Imagine not talking to someone who
lives with you under one roof for a year!
Yes, that restricted feeling is
exactly how I felt after a terrible conflict I had with my sister 8 years ago.
Being the youngest child in my family, I often get bullied and ordered around
by my elder siblings. Sometimes, I wish that I had a younger brother to vent my
frustrations on.
One day, I received an urgent text
message from my sister, asking me to bring her assignment to her school as it
was due on the day itself. She sounded really worried in her text messages and
I did not want her to be punished. So I decided to do her a favor. On my way
there, I kept calling my sister as I needed to know where I could look for her.
She did not answer all my calls and I was starting to get a little annoyed.
When I arrived, she texted me and said that she is out with her friends and I
do not have to pass her the assignment anymore. Apparently, her teacher
extended the submission deadline and she did not inform me about it. I
felt really furious as it took me an hour to travel to her school and I had to
postpone my meet up with my friends. It turned out that I have made a wasted
trip!
I shouted at her the moment she
entered the house and did not bother listening to her explanations. I
stomped back to my room and slammed the door so hard that I could feel a slight
vibration of my room.
That action of mine, triggered off
the cold war. Whenever we walk pass one another, we avoided eye contact.
Whenever we have something to tell one another, our mum had to pass on the
message for us. It was really tough living this way. Many a times I needed her
help with my homework, but I refused to be the one who break the silence.
This cold war went on for about a
year until one day, I decided to lower my pride. Being a sweet little sister, I
folded a jar of paper stars and wrote her a letter of apology. After all, it
was my fault to have shouted at her. The next day, I received a note titled:
“The hatchet has been buried”.
Since then, we become so much closer
than before. We travelled overseas together and spend sleepless nights
gossiping with one another. I wonder if we would be this close if this incident
did not happen.
Miscommunications are bound to occur in life. We should not act rashly, but instead allow one to explain himself/herself before starting an argument. The cold war can be seen as a good chance for us to reflect on our actions and only then, we realize how important it is to treasure each other’s company and not take one another for granted. Don’t you agree?
Yes totally- I've had those cold wars with my own sister but now that we're both older- we realize what a waste of time such things are. perhaps the takeaway from this experience is as you yourself said-give the other person a chance to explain before getting angry and jumping to conclusions.
ReplyDeleteI think after reading your post it seemed clear that there was a lack of courtesy and consideration on both sides. Your sister clearly did not consider your feeling of making a wasted trip down to pass her the assignment and it seems to me that she often take you for granted by ordering you around the house. However, on your part, you were not courteous enough to allow your sister to voice out her explanation regarding the situation. As a result I believe this cause a breakdown in communication between you and your sister simply due to a lack of awareness of the 7Cs. Hence, once again, I believe courtesy and consideration should have been exercised both ways to prevent this cold war crisis.
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